As we wrap up 2013 and start the New Year, I thought a blog post was in order. Why? Because of New Years resolutions and all that jazz of course (this is a lifestyle blog right?). Now before you roll your eyes and say “I don’t believe in New Years resolutions Robyn, I live the dream”, well good for you, but do you really not believe with all of your being? No, well FINE then…
I only say this because I AM a believer! Not all of my resolutions stick, but at least one usually does to some degree. We are not perfect and are not going to stick to our “I’m never going to eat chocolate EVER again” or “I’m going to learn Chinese” promises that we jubilantly make to ourselves, but in my opinion that’s not the point. The point of resolving to achieve a goal is to simply work towards one in the quest of self-improvement.
This isn’t implying that your aren’t already a talented, funny, beautiful, wonderful (etc.) individual already (I know you are), but it’s to promise yourself you are going to try new things that you want to do! Now, figuring out if it’s really what you want or what you think you want is another issue. For insight on that click here.
Ok enough rambling. What this blog post is about is a method to help you if one of your goals is to improve or increase the amount of physical fitness you have. Big shocker there I know!
I have many blog posts on motivation, but in my opinion and through experience one the most powerful motivators to enhance the amount of physical activity you get is to seek out and achieve a sense of social connection/social support/sense of community!!! There is some research to back this up but at the moment strong evidence is lacking. For more see Bauman, 2012 for a review, which is cited at the end of this post (I put that there for all the physiotherapy students and researchers who are grading my level of evidence........Look what you've become).
Now, seeking a sense of community through physical fitness will not work for everyone. We are not a one size fits all species with all of our wonderful cognitions and “free thoughts”. However, for many seeking out activities that increase connection with others and feelings of belonging can keep them engaged and motivated when times get tough.
You know, when week 4 hits after January 1st and you are ready to give up or when you get the flu in March and never go back to the gym?… Those tough times.
So how do you know this will work for you? Well, there’s no easy way to say this, and hopefully you don’t close my blog as soon as you read this, but you have to simply try it. This means you have to put yourself out there!
Before you say “NO, I hate fitness people. They judge me and I’m not one of them”, hear me out. The truth is a lot of people in the fitness industry have their own success stories (i.e., they weren’t BORN gym rats) and actually quite a few lived unhealthy lifestyles, have been bullied, and were scared of the gym (aka me). Sure there are some not so nice characters, but they are lame anyway.
So how do you achieve this elusive sense of belongingness? Read on.
Tip 1: Figure out what activity you are most likely to enjoy.
I say to my classes ALL THE TIME that I hate working out. I’m not lying, I really do during the activity itself (except for restorative yoga and climbing). It’s the feeling after I finish working out and the numerous benefits to my life and body that are the result of working out that I like.
So, there is a possibility that the idea of any physical activity is the most unappealing thing that you can think of. If that’s the case, try and think of an activity that would be the most tolerable for you to start.
This doesn’t have to be at a traditional gym by the way. Actually, there are plenty of "non traditional" modes of physical activity that force involvement with other people and can also lead to a sense of community.
Some examples are…
1. Rock Climbing (biased)
2. Any martial art
3. Recreational sport leagues (a lot of these have teams you can sign up for if you are a beginner or/AND are by yourself)
4. Roller derby
5. Zumba
6. Bootcamp classes
7. Spinning classes
8. Running/walking clubs
And those are just off the top of my head.
Tip 2: Bug your friends/acquaintances
Another great way to get involved in an activity in a low pressure yet social way is to ask one of your friends OR acquaintances (new friend in the making) who does *insert activity of interest here* if you can join them the next time they go.
I LOVE IT when people want to workout or climb with me, and I can be pretty antisocial. So if you have that friend who does an activity you are super interested (or even just kind of interested) they will likely be more than happy, if not ecstatic, that you want to try what they do with them. It makes people feel super special and stuff.
I find one issue people have with this method is the negative self talk that surrounds asking someone that you perceive as in “better shape than you” to work out. It usually goes something like this….
“I’d love to try snowboarding/zumba/yoga/etc, but *person* is soooooooooooooo good at it, I don’t want them to think I’m out of shape/suck/am a loser/etc.”
If you actually read that it seems kind of silly, but that self-talk is powerful (for more of self talk click here and here). A lot of the time our ego will get in the way of taking chances and trying new things. Yea, you probably WILL suck when you try something you have never done before, and you know what, people (cool people at least) will not judge you for being a beginner. You’re not friends with those judgmental types anyhoo right?
Tip 3: Take the steps to try out a new activity in the most social way possible
If you aren’t one for taking the “lets go do things friend” method, or none of your friends do anything fun, try and involve yourself in your new activity of choice (see tip 1) in the most social way possible.
This may seem like a hard thing to do, especially if you are on the shy side. Fitness classes are great to give you a weekly schedule and put you in a situation with a bunch of people trying to achieve the same thing as you.
If you feel that you cannot afford a gym membership, you don’t have to get one. Actually, most cities actually offer free fitness classes. I know right? A lot of people don’t know this, but if you go to the “parks and recreation” or “health and wellness” sections of most township webpages you’ll find a whole bunch of free fitness classes offered at a variety of times.
If you do have some money to spend, but don’t want to commit to a gym membership, there are also a variety of organizations that allow you to do punch passes and month try outs with no contract.
The way to find out which organizations offer these services is to call around and ask! Most people at alternative sport and fitness centers are super duper awesome and friendly.
So you are set to go to your thing that you have chosen. Now, something to keep in mind is when you go to said activity, even if it is IN a social setting (e.g., fitness class), it is really easy to not be social at all when going.
To avoid this trap I would suggest doing some of the following…
1. DO go early or stay late: If you go to a fitness class 15 minutes before it starts there is a very good chance you will find yourself standing next to someone who is also about to do the same class. This is a prime opportunity to meet some of the regulars/new people in the class to form friendships to increase your motivation to go. Also, take your sweet ass time leaving. Usually the more social people hang around after the classes and talk to each other and the instructors.
2. DON’T avoid eye contact: If you’re super shy, even just acknowledging people by looking at them and saying a quick “hello” may open the doors for conversation. If you avoid contact with people at all costs it makes it hard to make friendships to keep you motivated.
3. DO take the opportunity to do meet and greets: A lot of facilities will have special nights dedicated to “women only” or “beginners”, especially if you are doing less conventional things like martial arts or climbing. Take these opportunities to meet people. It may be a little anxiety provoking at first, but the people running these events are usually experts at making sure people have fun.
4. DON’T listen to your negative self talk: If you are a little on the antisocial side, and often have the self talk that no one would want to hang out with you, you’re out of shape, and all that fun stuff, learn to change that way of thinking. Often we are our own worst enemies when it comes to behaviour change, especially involving social situations. The first step is to recognize when you are saying these things to yourself. As previously mentioned I have several posts on self talk. The links are above, but if you don't want to scroll up just click here or here
My final tip is for those already active!
A lot of my blog readers are already active. So this tip is to specifically address you…yes YOU. If you’ve made it this far you have a little insight on what may be going through someone’s head when trying to lead a more active lifestyle. Unless you’ve been an athlete from a very young age you have probably been in the "I want to start to be active but am scared of everyone and everything" situation before (I know I have).
So, this year try to acknowledge those people in your life that you are hearing the “I want to lose weight this year” and “I want to be active this year” "BUT".....messages from. I bet you can guess what I’m going to say next…
Invite them to do your kick-ass physical activity of choice. They may roll their eyes, they may give you the “well I suck and you don’t” self-talk, or simply say no. However, if you can get one person to say yes, you are being a super awesome leader in your own world. Not to mention a pretty wicked friend. Remind them that you are a non-judgmental super fun person that was a beginner once as well.
So go out and be your awesome self, and resolve to try new things this year. I bet you’ll like it!
Happy New Year everyone!!!!
Stay Strong
~Byn
Review on the determinants of physical activity:
Bauman AE et al. (2012). Correlates of physical activity: Why are some people physically activate and others not?" The Lancet. 380 (9839): 258-271
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